Kelly's First Hoop Video

In the time I've been here are Wollam Gardens I've met some pretty cool folks. I've become particularly close to my fellow interns and housemates, Karineh and Nicole who have introduced me to this fun activity called hooping. While I'm very shy with it, as I've never thought myself particularly good at dancing (even though I love to dance), their praise made me wonder what I truly look like. So I taped myself and I'm actually diggin' it. I'm not fully into it, as I'm too aware of the camera, but I was certainly surprised.

So, I guess... without further adieu, my first hooping video:

Titles are often useless.

"if you yourself are not a safe place for you... then you will never feel comfortable and you will never move forward."

–Life lessons that pop into my head that I swear I'll live by but disagree with a month later

Once, I found out a fellow peer of my generation thought me to be vapid. It stung, a lot, even though in my soul of souls I knew it was not true. They had a special disgust for the way I was living my life, especially when my mother was sick and dying–vapid, distasteful, disrespectful, uncaring, unfeeling and 

DAMN I can tell you, as a certainty, there was no moment of unfeeling in that section of my life, not one millisecond. 

However, 

it burrows deeper into my consciousness, feeding the insurmountable regret I already contend with–the special kind reserved only for those who've lost their loves. . . 

"I should have, I cannot! It shall never be; there are no more chances."

Standing up, I throw the truth at it: The regret is something only you carry

                                                       None of that is true, none of it is you

                                                       Their opinions on YOU are made of horse-shit. 

But these words are so strong. I feebly sit down again. The foul opinions and harsh judgements wash over me. Again, I am slumped. 

Foolish human, did you ever think yourself so cruel?

I pledge henceforth (and have been practicing months prior) to judge not another soul in a hurtful manner. 

'Tis a constant struggle. A daily fail. But I vow to be conscious. I vow not to sling more unneeded pain into another's life. 

"Don't let the opinions of others get you down!"

I know I should not listen.

I know we should be stronger. 

But... we're all not strong sometimes. 

give a little wiggle room

P.S.

My hypnotherapist told me I should add "PS. I'm not going to kill myself" to the end of my blog posts so that I don't feel a need to create a false positive twist for certain readers. While it may not apply with this particular post, I feel I must get in the habit. 

P.P.S

I'm not going to kill myself.